Spring Break
Bucking tradition
and following the
path of my heart
Issue date: 9/4/08 Section: Opinion
What caught my attention was a section called, "Real Couples," where men and women described their experiences dating outside of their race.
I felt encouraged, almost proud, to see people risking their reputations to be with the person they loved. A couple stories struck a chord with me, speaking of the shame they caused their families and the threats they received from their parents.
I have it coming too, but I'm not afraid. I care about my family, but why should I be limited to the people I choose to love?
The main goals of the LovingDay Web site are, "To fight prejudice through education and to build a sense of community among people who engage in meaningful interracial and intercultural relationships." I fully support these goals. It's not easy receiving angry looks from strangers as though my relationship were inferior or blasphemous. Who are they to judge the dynamics of my relationship?
The problem is that many are unwilling to understand and accept my unique choice for a partner. For my family, tradition must survive, so marriage to anyone other than my parents' choice is out of the question … until now.
I chose not to forsake my happiness for tradition, and have been dating my boyfriend who is … Well, does it really matter what he is? We are happy together, and for us, that's enough.
I felt encouraged, almost proud, to see people risking their reputations to be with the person they loved. A couple stories struck a chord with me, speaking of the shame they caused their families and the threats they received from their parents.
I have it coming too, but I'm not afraid. I care about my family, but why should I be limited to the people I choose to love?
The main goals of the LovingDay Web site are, "To fight prejudice through education and to build a sense of community among people who engage in meaningful interracial and intercultural relationships." I fully support these goals. It's not easy receiving angry looks from strangers as though my relationship were inferior or blasphemous. Who are they to judge the dynamics of my relationship?
The problem is that many are unwilling to understand and accept my unique choice for a partner. For my family, tradition must survive, so marriage to anyone other than my parents' choice is out of the question … until now.
I chose not to forsake my happiness for tradition, and have been dating my boyfriend who is … Well, does it really matter what he is? We are happy together, and for us, that's enough.
Viewing Comments 1 - 3 of 3
Raj
posted 9/05/08 @ 8:54 AM PST
Please be happy that you are an Indo-American. I am glad your parents would approve if you dated an Indian, any Indian. If you were in a fundamentalizt family back in India, whether you were a Hindu or a moslem or even for that matter in the UK, your life would be in danger, even if you dated another Indian as happened recently in a village of Haryana. (Continued…)
Imran
posted 9/12/08 @ 1:02 PM PST
words are like lines that make up a painting. choose them well, and let them paint away. show them all the beauty they poses inside. give them a sense of pride. (Continued…)
Ken Tanabe
posted 10/06/08 @ 6:28 AM PST
Dear Kaajal,
My name is Ken Tanabe and I am the founder of Loving Day. I want to thank you for writing this great article. I hope that others will be inspired to host their own Lovng Day Celebration, to learn more, and to spread the word. (Continued…)
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