Spring Break
The growing pains of being biracial
Dominique Dumadaug
Issue date: 11/4/09 Section: Opinion
It all starts after people are comfortable talking to me. They ask me the questions I dread.
"If you don't mind me asking, what is your ethnic background?"
Well, I'm biracial - I am Filipino and Mexican.
"Oh, that's cool," the person usually says. "Because you look like you could be both, you look mixed."
And then the other question is asked, "So which nationality do you consider yourself most?"
Good Lord, I hate that question. How can I consider myself more of one ethnicity than another? That's when the smart ass in me comes out.
"I consider myself American," I tell them.
That usually confuses them. I can always see the confused look on their faces.
"What? Why? I don't get it," they say. "Which side of your family are you closer to? What does your group of friends look like?"
That's when I can feel my face getting red with frustration. And the lengthy explanation begins.
I am biracial, so that means I am equal parts Filipino and Mexican. Hence, I do not identify myself as more of one race than another.
I consider myself American, because I was born and raised here in America.
My mother was born here, and my father emigrated here from the Philippines when he was 8 years old. They met here, got married here and raised a family here.
My mother doesn't speak Spanish, because my grandparents wanted their children's first language to be English, and my father never forced me to learn Tagalog, a Filipino dialect, probably because he didn't feel I needed it.
Now, as I have gotten older, and can see how speaking another language can be beneficial to employment, I wish I did take the time to learn Spanish and Tagalog.
At work, people always come up and ask me questions in another language. All they get from me is a deer-in-the-headlights look and an apology for not being able to help them out.
I never felt any favoritism between either side of my family. I love both sides of my family, because they are my family. Both sides are very tight-knit, and I feel a strong and close connection to all of my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.
Plenty of time with both sides of the family has been spent on holidays, birthdays, barbecues and weddings throughout my life.
It's just like asking people which child is their favorite. It's insulting.
As for my friends, I have friends of all ethnicities as well.
I have friends that are Filipino, Vietnamese, Mexican, white, black, Peruvian, Indian, Chinese and Puerto Rican.
I don't hang out with just one group of people, because there isn't just one group of people here in America, in California, in San Jose.
That's the beauty of growing up in such a diverse country, state and city, such as where we live - there are so many cultures, religions and ethnicities that it is outdated to lump people into one group.
"If you don't mind me asking, what is your ethnic background?"
Well, I'm biracial - I am Filipino and Mexican.
"Oh, that's cool," the person usually says. "Because you look like you could be both, you look mixed."
And then the other question is asked, "So which nationality do you consider yourself most?"
Good Lord, I hate that question. How can I consider myself more of one ethnicity than another? That's when the smart ass in me comes out.
"I consider myself American," I tell them.
That usually confuses them. I can always see the confused look on their faces.
"What? Why? I don't get it," they say. "Which side of your family are you closer to? What does your group of friends look like?"
That's when I can feel my face getting red with frustration. And the lengthy explanation begins.
I am biracial, so that means I am equal parts Filipino and Mexican. Hence, I do not identify myself as more of one race than another.
I consider myself American, because I was born and raised here in America.
My mother was born here, and my father emigrated here from the Philippines when he was 8 years old. They met here, got married here and raised a family here.
My mother doesn't speak Spanish, because my grandparents wanted their children's first language to be English, and my father never forced me to learn Tagalog, a Filipino dialect, probably because he didn't feel I needed it.
Now, as I have gotten older, and can see how speaking another language can be beneficial to employment, I wish I did take the time to learn Spanish and Tagalog.
At work, people always come up and ask me questions in another language. All they get from me is a deer-in-the-headlights look and an apology for not being able to help them out.
I never felt any favoritism between either side of my family. I love both sides of my family, because they are my family. Both sides are very tight-knit, and I feel a strong and close connection to all of my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.
Plenty of time with both sides of the family has been spent on holidays, birthdays, barbecues and weddings throughout my life.
It's just like asking people which child is their favorite. It's insulting.
As for my friends, I have friends of all ethnicities as well.
I have friends that are Filipino, Vietnamese, Mexican, white, black, Peruvian, Indian, Chinese and Puerto Rican.
I don't hang out with just one group of people, because there isn't just one group of people here in America, in California, in San Jose.
That's the beauty of growing up in such a diverse country, state and city, such as where we live - there are so many cultures, religions and ethnicities that it is outdated to lump people into one group.
Viewing Comments 1 - 1 of 1
ben cadena
posted 11/04/09 @ 11:01 PM PST
i HAVE DEALT WITH THESE ISSUES ALSO, FINALLY LEARNED SPANISH AFTER 30 YEARS BECAUSE i PROMISED MYSELF AT GRANDMA'S FUNERAL THAT i WOULD LEARN SPANISH. (Continued…)
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